upcoming holiday

I am sitting here thinking that i should be out buying stuff for my girls for Easter so that the Bunny can get all the credit for making them happy for a lil while,BUT i just cant get into the spirit. On Sunday April 8th Audrianna will be having her 3rd CancerVersary....Easter is 3yrs to the day she was diagnosed and even though i should be jumping up and down for joy because she is Alive 3yrs later i just cant...my baby should be healed by now, she should have Hair and she should be happy and playing with her friends and going to school and instead she is Still Sick, getting chemo,bald, and trying her hardest to Be Happy so people dont see how bad she feels....these are the things people dont see...our baby puts on her smiley happy face and pretends that her tummy doesnt hurt and she wasnt just throwing up everything she had for lunch...they dont understand that she gets tired so easy but pushes herself to play because she doesnt want to miss things BUT i understand that and so that makes this Easter Bittersweet....3yrs alive after diagnosis when they gave her less then a 20percent chance to live YAY but 3yrs still sick BOO DAMMIT. So as we go into the Easter Holiday we will ALL put on our fake happy faces and make the best of the day.
It's also hard knowing so many of our friends are sick....Emilee is just trying to get through Easter at home so she doesnt have to be in the hospital having another brain surgery.....and our friend Kayla is in the hospital fighting for her life because her body is rejecting the donor heart she just recieved.....i find it very hard to smile through all this but im asking that All of You Smile for us and say the Prayers i find hard to say so that Kayla will pull through, Emilee will get better and Audrianna will be N.E.D. on her next scan......Hope you all have a Happy Easter